Recently I was discussing day cares with a friend who is going back to work and looking for a daycare for her three-year-old. She has never put her son in daycare and was asking me what type of questions to ask as well as some of the local daycares and what I thought about them or my experiences. Joey and Shelby were in daycare until Joey was about sixteen-months-old and I lost my job.
As I was sharing with her my experiences, I mentioned a local daycare, part of a chain, that we had really enjoyed having our children at. She cut me off and informed me another friend cautioned her away from that location. She mentioned that the other friend kept her child at this center for three years and hated every minute of it and was so glad when it was time for “graduation.”
This perplexed me, her friend had offered her no reason for why she was so displeased and that led me to wonder, if it was that terrible, why did you keep your child there for three years? The “every minute of it” part bothered me. So, what prevented this person from seeking out other accommodations? I mean, there are tons of daycares in and around the area where we live. Was it a matter of cost? Was it just not wanting to look at other options? Really, what was the reason???
Is there ever a good reason to keep a child in a situation that we are unsatisfied with? My initial reaction is no. But I understand that sometimes circumstances dictate that we at least temporarily live with a bad situation. The friend of a friend, though, seemed to be having a delayed overreaction it seemed to a bad situation. Maybe she regrets the decision to not move her child out, or maybe she hasn’t come to the realization yet that there is no reason why she couldn’t have moved her child at some point, if not immediately.
That moment, the moment when I say, “enough is enough,” comes at different times in different situations, but when it hits, I stop whatever is no longer satisfactory. I stop making excuses about why I live with it. I stop rationalizing the bad situation. It’s no talking and all action. Maybe having Shelby and realizing that I have to be a little demanding sometimes has made me this way…I don’t know. All I do know is there is no way my children would have been in a situation I felt so strongly negative about for so long.